Play your sport “Assertively”

Last month we talked about the objective aspects of your sport — the field of play, the weather conditions and the game itself. Are they your friend or your foe, when it comes to your mindset?
This month let’s talk about the subjective aspects — that would be, you. What is your personality? What are your dominant tendencies? How might they interact with your performance?

Personality
Do you tend to be more passive or aggressive in your approach to playing the game? That is, do you like to sit back and let the game come to you, or do you prefer to go on the attack? Do you like to methodically pick your opponent apart, or would you rather blow them away? Either passivity or aggressiveness can work, but it is helpful to identify which style you are most comfortable with.

In tennis, are you a backboard, or do you like to rush the net? In golf, do you play it like chess, strategically placing your shots around the course; or do you like to go for broke — cutting corners, shooting at pins and charging putts of any length?

Again, either option can work, but only if it fits your personality. That is, a more passive player might get very uncomfortable if forced to attack, charge and take chances, when that attitude doesn’t fit their personality.

Attitude
If there were a compromise between passivity and aggressiveness, one might call it “Assertiveness;” and this might be the wisest way for most athletes to play.

One of the best images I can think of for comparing passivity, aggressiveness and assertiveness is a football lineman who lines up across from his opponent and has one of three demeanors about him:  (1) The passive player might approach his assignment timidly, concerned, even fearful. Of course, there is no place for this in football. (2) The aggressive player might come to the line all puffed up, snorting and growling; but when the snap is made, he might be revealed as a pushover. (3) Now the assertive player would go to the line with energy, and with an additional air of confidence, a look in his eye that says to the player across from him, “You are going down. I don’t have to try to talk you into it. You are simply going down.” Of course, this attitude comes from being fully in shape and prepared to play. An assertive attitude is earned, while aggressiveness and passivity indicate that your are probably not up to the task.

Whether a tennis player, golfer, runner, cyclist or a young buck playing one of the major team sports; cultivate a look in your eye, a calmness in your demeanor, and an un-rushed behavioral routine, all of which conveys that you are in control of the situation. That is what assertiveness looks like.

Let others do the trash-talking, huffing and puffing and contorted posturing trying to suggest that they are something they are not. You know who you are: a well-practiced, totally prepared performer, quietly going about your business and ready for whatever is about to be thrown at you.

Dr. Tom Dorsel is a clinical/sport psychologist on HHI and best selling author of “GOLF: The Mental Game.” Dr. Tom can be reached on Facebook or through his website, Dorsel.com.